Melvin Capital joins the Bitcoin Boom by investing 100 million into cryptocurrency

Early Saturday morning, Melvin Capital was seen, transparently, purchasing over 100 million dollars worth of cryptocurrency. Gabriel Plotkin told The Crypt Street Journal “I’ve never been so bullish in my life.” Melvin Capital is just one of the thousand big players who have finally decided to invest smart with their money. Bloomberg reported that after the horrific loss from the Short Squeeze of GameStop (GME), Melvin was in the negative, and sent thousands of emails to financial analysts looking for a way back in the money. And that answer was Bitcoin.

“We at Melvin Capital are always one step ahead of the competition”, Gabriel told The Crypt Street Journal. “Microstrategy has nothing on us. 40 million? 50 million? Yeah we will do 2 times that!”

A detailed inspection of Blockchain Explorer showed that Melvin Capital purchased $50,000,000 in Bitcoin and $25,000,000 in Ether. The remaining $25,000,000 was unfortunately invested in TRX, the TRON projected created by Justin Sun.

Plotkin was seen at McDonald’s late Friday night constantly refreshing Blockfolio while waiting for his BigMacs off the $1 menu with pal Warren Buffet. Plotkin was overheard saying “I should have bought more DOT and ETH.”

In recent news, Melvin Capital was present during the GameStop Congressional hearing with Keith Gill and Citadel to discuss the recent market manipulation that Melvin Capital and Citadel obviously conducted behind the scenes using Robinhood as their means of attack. The CEO of Robinhood, Vlad Tenev is currently restricted from buying cryptocurrency, as he stated “I cannot remember my Coinbase login password.”

We welcome you Melvin Capital, we welcome you to Mars. Glad you are on board. Who’s next? Citadel? One can only hope.